Feel the fear and do it anyway

Sunday, July 08, 2018

I got set into the routine of 5:30am alarm clocks, 6am gym classes and a 9:30pm bed time, I was out for the count not to be woken for anything to the point where mum asked me was I taking sleeping tablets. This all quickly turned into sleepless unsettled nights, a constant nervous feeling in my stomach and the reluctance to dwell on the ache of missing my family. 

I kept telling myself "this will be the best thing I'll do." Trying to silence the voice in the back of my head... "will it?". In an ideal world I'm not a worrier or a stresser. In the real world I grind my teeth and can toss in bed the whole night. The months before going I talked about it like it was a breeze and just one big adventure, which it was. Then came the last few weeks at home before going and I had to ask myself 10 times a day what the hell was I actually getting myself in for. Then came everyone I know wanting to talk about it in excitement with me (except my sister who couldn't cope with it and still can't..) and to be honest, it was probably the last thing I wanted to talk about the closer it got.

Why do we feel the fear? Because home is safe. The same routine of going to work, as much as we might not want to admit it, is safe. A routine which I moaned about and said on countless occasions that I'd had enough of, was now the thing I wanted to stay for, the night before my first flight. 

Just because I left my job, packed up and took this trip doesn't mean to say everyone should do the same. Your fear could be in anything. Applying for a job, leaving an unhappy situation or venturing into something new. Because home, whatever that may be for you, will always be there. 

I'm a great believer of what's for you won't pass you but not if you're sat at home. It's only when you decide to put yourself out there can these opportunities decide to take you or pass you. 

Sure look, what's a year out of your life or a few rejections in the grand scheme of things. So decide to feel the fear but go ahead and do it anyway, whatever the fear might be for you. 

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